Yoga - let's discuss

Hop in cold car.
Sit in traffic.
Drool over dark blue Cayman S.
Sit in traffic.
Park in lot several miles from home so hubby can have nice front door parking spot for monster truck.
Walk dogs until hands freeze and nose falls off -and still dogs aren't 'finished'.
Turn on giant television size of, well, me, intending to flick on yoga dvd. when -gasp- what to my wondering eyes does appear? Why it's Food Network in HD.

So i sit here thinking, gotta go get on the yoga gear and pull out the mat -and pull down the shades, STAT. Then i thought, uuuug, yoga pants, what the f* was wrong with the person or persons behind yoga pants? Synapses misfired in a fairly severe way my friends.

"I know! I know! If these twits are going to be turning themselves into human crazy straws in an effort to lengthen and strengthen, I say we complete the scene."

That's when yoga pants were invented. Sewiously. [in my best Homestar voice which isn't very good at all]. If you're doing yoga, it's most assuredly NOT because you already look like Heidi Klum. So why oh why would you make pants out of SPANDEX? I don't care if it's disguised with cotton so it looks all soft and fuzzy. Or like mine where they added flared legs like trendy jeans. You can't fool me. It still grabs your ass like a misbehavin' prom date. Ug.

Damn. Now Good Eats is on. And i have to go don spandex pants and a tiny tank?? You have got to be kidding me.